afraid and nervous

to be blunt it's that time again, and i'm afraid so much. they said the hormones would help me not to get sick or be in pain, but i'm scared shitless. i was in such misery last time...i still feel bad for ruining the second viewing of the matrix for all of my friends... i'm at work too, so if i get sick it should get really interesting. making it worse is the fact that i'm on other medication for an unrelated problem that is making my liver worse, so i am tired and weak already. sort of wondering if the two problems are related, but whatever. i hope i pull through. dad called and apologized for being a rabid dufus, but then continued to bullshit me. my brain is done trying. T-minus 3 hours before work is over. yeah.