death to cars.

so, car might be done for after only 3 or 4 months of use. it's almost inconceivably stressful. it seems like other people have some sort of fall back option. they can use their parent's car, or borrow their parents money, or at least get emotional support. i just feel like i'm missing that sort of support. but such is life. nothing that happens to me will change others. i have such joy and prosperity in some areas of my life but yet other areas will continue to rot. sometimes i think the only answer is to 'pull weeds' (as to continue a shot metaphor). i just don't know how to say goodbye or how to just dismiss family. what do i owe to those who bore me? i've mulled over this for a long time and always seem to get hurt trying to produce a difinitive answer. i want so badly for something magical to make these people into what i know they can be, but i don't think that it will happen.